"I believe in accidents, but this was no accident," the preacher spoke. "I said, I believe in accidents, but this was no accident," he repeats himself.
"Go ahead preacher," a voice calls from the back of the church.
"This was an act of God. Our dear brother was too kind for this world. He was too caring, too gracious, too humble. We didn't deserve him, so God called him home. The same way, he called Jesus home. Are you hearing me now," he yells out and members of the congregation cheer.
He preaches on and on about how good God is, the preacher knows a lot about God. He doesn't know shit about my brother. Just claims about how gentle and kind he was. My brother was not a gentle man. I remember when I was in high school, a group of guys jumped me and stole my bike. My brother caught a Greyhound from his college campus, three cities over. He beat the fuck out of those guys and almost went to jail for it. Yeah, he was caring, but not in a rub your belly because you ate too much way. A break your enemies and make them humble kind of way.
Outside the church people whisper like I can't hear them. Suicide, he's going to burn in Hell. Fuck them, what do they know? They never died, they don't have the answers. They weren't there for him when he was suffering. I couldn't save him on my own and not a single one of these fuckers tried to help him. But they show up like they care. I can only hear how sorry they are for me three more times at the most before I snap someone's neck.
"There's no need to be sad young man. He won't be suffering anymore," a man I've never seen places his hand on my shoulder.
"How about you get the fuck off me," I tell him, more than ask.
Accident, how the fuck is suicide and accident. That's just some shit my parents told people to make it more acceptable. Suicide? Oh, he must have been a nut job. Accidental overdose on his medication? Must have forgot he took it earlier in the day. Real shame. Nobody here knows anything about him, and if they do they're more concerned with making everything look perfect. All of this shit is a sham.
