"How much for the TV," someone calls out from the living room as I collect the money for the lamps.

"What do you think it's worth," I ask eager to make a sale.

"I'll give you $50 for it," he says trying to low ball me.

"I need at least $100 for it. You know it's worth more than that," just gotta set my price and if he can't accept it then that's it.

"Alright, fine," he says handing me the money before removing the TV from the wall.

Who does this? Sells the things from their home just to keep the home? I don't even like the house but if I can't make the payment before the 1st then it's a wrap for me. I'm fucked if I don't do this. I just gotta get the money. If I can make that payment then I can make it to next month. I just need a little bit of money so I can buy time. If I can buy time I can make it. I just need the time first.

I'm lying to myself. I don't really have a plan but I keep telling myself I have a plan. I bought this house thinking I would have other people helping me. In the end they all bailed so it's just me now. I should have trusted my heart.

With the TV I'm still about $600 short of what I need. I've heard of people throwing parties and charging admission to get in like a nightclub but I don't have the money to spend on party favors. Fuck. I wonder how much I could make from renting out a room for a few days. Well I can't really rent out a room, I've sold half my furniture. Fuck, why don't I ever think this through.

I've gotta call my cousin. I don't want to, but I know he'll lend me the money. He's always thought he was better than me, but this will give him the joy he's always been seeking. There's no other way I can do this. None of this is my fault anyway. I didn't know my roommates would bail out. I didn't know the government would be shut down for three months. Who could predict that? I've got a new job but I won't get my first check until the 8th. The bank says they've already given me enough time.

"Everyone, get the hell out of my house," I start yelling out. I'm done with this. I'll just call and borrow the money. I've tried to make it through without borrowing money but it can't be done so fuck it. I'm not selling anything else. I'll call my cousin and whatever happens after that just happens.

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